Image by JOE MARINARO via Flickr
I do not know what it is about Christmas that makes me sad, lonely, and depressed. I cannot recall anything – not a memory, not a particular emotion, that would have made me feel what I have been feeling these past Christmases. I wish I can pinpoint to a trigger, a flicker of emotion, anything at all. So that I can fix it. So that I can move on.
I do try to move on. I try to be as excited as I could during the Christmas season – with the shopping, the gifts, the food, the company and being on vacation. Funny though that the exact same things also brings stress, panic and anxiety.
But life goes on. And I try to make it to be another day.
I do know that I am not alone in this – the depression during the holidays. That is why statistics show how the holidays is the time where suicide peaks at an all time high.
I do not like Christmas. But I try and go through the motions. And think about the kids, the other people who get excited about Christmas. And I make it and I trudge along.
Donut Face Diaries 